Fat rage, instead of 'roid rage...

Man, I haven't updated this in ages. Why? Cause I got fat...I feel like one of those athletes who were caught cheating, or using steroids (no hate towards A-Rod), or even like a President after a scandal. I feel like I let, not only myself, a lot of people down. When I started my weight loss journey, I had inspired a few of my friends even. My friend Jen (http://theroadto100-jennifer.blogspot.com) had even started her own weight loss journey. I felt powerful, and not in the evil-power kinda way. I felt like I was an example, and proved that anyone could do it. I know there are NO EXCUSES, but I guess I'll throw my excuses for now: - work (different shifts. working overnight, switching to a normal shift, etc) - relationships (a few toxic guys in my life here and there) - money (no money to buy quality food to make quality meals) - sucky gym (lamest of the excuses, but I had switched from LA Boxing to Planet Fitness due to my overnight work schedule) - injuries (guess who messed up her shoulder again? and now I need surgery!) - etc.. Anyway, I need to rebuild myself. I need to be my own inspiration. If I did it once, I can do it again. And I need to do it again. It just sucks that I let myself, and everybody else down.

On Today's Plate: 10 Years of Me

2002: how most of my high school friends/classmates remember me like
2004 - 2008: how most of my college friends/classmates remember me like (...I need a reunion, lol)
2011: that's how people know me now-ish!!

In case you haven't figured it out, that's 10 years of me. The first pic dates back to 2002. I was about 17 or 18...definitely college bound. At that time, I thought I was fat. I dieted, exercised, and did just about anything to not be fat. Apparently it didn't work (as in, I wasn't quite as motivated later on) because I shot up to about 220+ lbs. (see 2004 - 2008). I actually stopped weighing myself once I went over 220 lbs because I just didn't want to know anymore. I had given up.

I now weigh 185 lbs. On the most "recent" (the one with the cute dress, was taken in late April) picture of my collage I was at around 180 lbs. I'm hoping to drop back to 155 and be toned (I'm not scared of muscles). I hope to someday fight too (in the 145 lbs category).

The sad thing is that, I still look at myself in the mirror and all I see is fat and grossness. I need to change my perceptions of myself, and boost up my self esteem so that I can work harder at achieving my goals without getting discouraged.

But yea, ten years of me...raging from 150-something lbs all the way up to 220+ (gross! I stopped weighing myself after that), and lost about 50+ lbs.

For my awesomely international readers: that's ranging from about 68 kilos up to 99+ kilos and lost about 22+ kilos

On Today's Plate: Goals Revisited

Hello everybody!! I know I haven't been updated because I've been a little bit busy...but not busy enough to stop with my daily exercise routine! Or to prepare savory healthy meals, which I will post soon :)

So March snuck up on me (hello),  and it's time to take a look at the goals I set for February...and you should do the same.

In case you forgot, or just don't want to scroll down, here are my goals:

- Drink more water: check! I carry my water with me at all times and refill it 

- Lose 5lbs by March: check! To my surprise, I actually lost 6.5 lbs!

- Study hard and train harder at Brazilian Jiu Jitsu: I started to train at the club that I used to train in last year again. It's been going rather well. 

- Sketch every day. no check :( I've kinda been slacking on this one. I did only one sketch for fun, the rest were for work purposes.

- Improve my posture. I think I've been improving it. I have a book on exercises to do in order to improve that posture! ...so check!

I think I managed to fulfill most of my goals, and I couldn't be happier! Especially that unexpected 6.5lb loss. Now would be a good time to set new goals. But, I think I'll post those tomorrow. 

Good night everybody (or good morning...it's morning somewhere!)