Once Upon a Time...

I considered myself a fit girl. It wasn't that much long ago, or in a galaxy far, far away. Even if at the moment it *does* feel like a long time ago. I had managed to successfully lose 50+ lbs (22.5 kilos -- gotta convert now that I'm on metric, but more on that later), and kept it off for a year and a half. During that period of time, I had gone through a terrible relationship, lost my job, and couldn't find a new job for 6 months. Yes, I was sad and depressed, but it actually kept me more motivated to go to the gym. Being unemployed allowed me to spend MORE time at the gym, hurray. Well, now you all know what I did with my unemployement checks :P ha! After applying for everything (literally! I filled out an application to work at a damn Burger King), I started to work at a nice luxury hotel. My new job was amazing. Not what I had in mind, since I didn't go to school to be in the hotel industry, but I was pleased with my job.

There was a downfall about working at the hotel: time management. I started to make new friends, and started going out after my working hours, that I began to neglect my gym activities, and my diet -- including jiu jitsu. The little time I did go to the gym, I wasn't as active as I was when I was unemployed. I slacked off more, I didn't "dig deeper", as Shaun T. would say. I wasn't training as hard as I used to. I started to get more motivated about going out with the hotel people rather than keeping true to my gym regime. Little by little, I started to gain some weight.

A year into my hotel job, I switched departments, and got a new position at the hotel during the graveyard shift. At the time, I had a freelance job during the daytime (sporadical, not daily), and later my graveyard shift. I even had less time for myself, or for my hotel hangouts. I didn't even have time for the gym any more. I had joined Planet Fitness in the hopes that I could workout anytime, since it was a 24 hour gym, but it unmotivated me even more (no hate, PF).

Fast forward to today...I'm currently living in Spain. I'm studying abroad, but not with a study abroad program, get it? :P Now, I do have free time to exercise. If I can manage my time correctly, which sometimes I still can't properly do that, I can wake up early every morning, for an Insanity workout, go running around Parc Güell, etc. I still feel like I'm doing something wrong. As if I'm missing out on something. I'm not getting the results I was expecting, or losing the weight as fast as I did a long time ago (in a galaxy far, far away). I don't want to use my age and metabolism as an excuse. I'm turning 30 next month, and all I hear is people just making me feel fucking old. "Sweety, you're turning 30, your metabolism isn't as fast as it was when you were 25....or 15" Listen, I know my metabolism bla bla bla, all that b.s. But that's no way to motivate me. Obviously, I might have to work harder, and diet more proper (what -- that last part didn't make any sense. It's not even proper English!!), but it can be done. I'm not going to use my "oh I'm so very old" age, or my metabolism as a stupid excuse.

I feel like I'm back at square one. Looking for all the endless solutions to my weight problems. I already KNOW what to do, I've done it before, what's keeping me from doing so? Sometimes I use my "oh, I don't have money to go to the gym" excuse. I KNOW I don't need a gym. First and foremost, what I need to do is control what goes into my damn mouth! I can't eat all the pa amb tomàquet in Barcelona...with a nice cold caña, not to mention those delicious bravas....ahh! At least I walk everywhere, or use a bicycle.

Well, here's to my journey (again).